Wednesday, January 30, 2008

So fast.

On Friday, Kali started wearing size one diapers instead of the newborn ones. I cried at the loss of the tiny newborn baby she was. I spent the rest of the afternoon in the rocking chair, holding her and sniffing her head.

On Saturday we took her to a party. For seven hours. She ate and slept like she does at home. I had a blast.

On Sunday my FIL dropped in without calling. We reiterated that he needs to call us. The kicker was that we already had plans to go over to the in-laws' house that evening, so I ended up with double the parent time. Grrr.

On Monday Kali cried from 6 pm to midnight. We think she was overtired. None of her rocking or vibrating seats were able to soothe her, so I developed some serious biceps as I rocked her, face down, in my arms and sang my entire repertoire of Sinatra songs.

On Tuesday night Kali took a bottle of expressed breast milk - Mr. December took one night feeding. No fuss, no confusion. Afterwards she started to cry and then to really wail. It was like a knife in my heart, that sound... hearing her distress and not calming her. It was very different from the times when she cries while I get dressed and I talk her through it. Very different. I almost cried.

None of these experiences will be forever. Kali will keep growing and changing. I know this, and a part of me welcomes seeing her get bigger, learn to smile and laugh and crawl. But another part of me wants to hold onto her just as she is, for as long as I can. She's growing so fast, and it's only been a month.

(happy one month, sweet girl)


April said...

It flies, doesn't it? My princess just celebrated her three month "birthday," and I simply cannot believe it.

Oh, and about that nighttime crying stuff - it gets better by three months. It's both heartbreaking and frustrating, but it gets easier!

Aurelia said...

Happy one month Kali!

And yeah that crying can be so heartbreaking, so sad. Luckily it gets better. Now go get some sleep.

Caro said...

Happy one month Kali.

Jennifer said...


Happy one month Kali.

And love to Mama.


Julie said...

Happy One Month Kali! It goes so fast...

I saved one of Livvie's size NB diapers. I can't believe how tiny her butt used to be...

ms. c said...

I can't BELIEVE it's been a month already.
Happy one month to Kali and to YOU!

jennyquarx said...

Happy 1 month Kali!

I also saved a NB diaper. Savor every second because it FLIES by so fast.

Much love to you all!!

Stacy Light Mygatt said...

I just found your blog--sounds like we're in the same boat, just a couple of months ahead!
I'm going to keep up on your adventures! Cheers!