Wednesday, September 09, 2009

the embarrassing truth

Okay, first things first: anybody who is leery of encountering TMI in regards to... um... non-medical stuff about me, stop reading when I tell you to.

We had the IUI on Monday morning. It went well, sperm were wonderfully motile, blah blah blah. I had acupuncture before and after, and honestly, it was fabulous - because it gave me a free pass to nap on a bed in the recovery room, instead of waiting in the waiting room for them to be ready for me. And true to form, they were ready for me a whole lot later than they said they'd be.

TMI coming up here. S'ok with me if you want to read this, but I don't want to make you uncomfortable.

So... the thing about the estrogen high I was on is that it made me... erm... somewhat randy. Okay, a lot randy. And it didn't help that I was reading a Pride and Prejudice sequel that more than hinted about the conjugal habits of Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth. Did I mention that I love reading bodice-rippers? Seriously, it's better than porn. Way better. Poor Mr. December.

Yes, you should pity him. Leading up to the IUI he was required to abstain for a couple of days. Here he was, uncharacteristically chaste, and there I was, really really enjoying my book. I'm not ashamed to say that I demanded satisfaction. And oh, it was good. And hey, I was well within my rights. According to Jewish law, a husband is required to make sure that he pleasures and satisfies his wife. Oh, how I love being Jewish!

It's amazing how happy I am in the wake of a weekend of conjugal bliss. Please remind me of this next time I start to feel anxious or depressed.

Now... where did I put that book?

3 comments:

Caro said...

LOL

Aurelia said...

I think it just enhances your chances of success!

heh

enhances

Dora said...

Hmmm, for some reason I'm feeling rather optimistic about this cycle. :-)